Soup, And Other Important Topics

Last night was a soup success!!  I've gotten an early start on my recipe resolution, and last night made a nice cabbage soup.  I saw cabbage on sale, and then thought about what would make a nice cabbage soup, so I picked up some potatoes and bacon.  When I got home I got to searchin.  There were a few contenders, but to be honest most of them were just about the same.  I didn't want a thick soup because the extra step of blending would have made the task seem insurmountable.  At any rate, I settled with this one:

http://www.rachaelraymag.com/recipes/rachael-ray-magazine-recipe-search/soup-recipes/cabbage-and-bacon-soup-with-garlic-bread

I skipped the bread and just ate a crusty bun to the side.  And I added carrot and celery.  Celery because it makes for a great tasting stock.  Carrots for the same reason but also because I recently purchased a 10lbs bag of carrots (for less than $2) and I need to start using them in my meals, post haste.  I must say, I do love me some cabbage soup.  There's just something about the consistency of boiled cabbage.  That sounds wrong, but it's so right.  YERM.  I did make one colossal mistake, but that being said it was still a fairly large success.  The instructions said to add the bacon at the end but I thought I would be smart, or my own personal interpretation of smart, and add the bacon at the beginning of the boil.  I thought it would add some level of bacon infusion that would be insanely brilliant.  Instead the boiling process ruined the consistency of the bacon and left very little to be desired in terms of baconinity.

I've been rewatching IT Crowd on Netflix.  I usually get around to it every year or so.  Never lets me down.  In fact I would go one step further and say that it's one of my favourite shows.  I was actually inspired to start my rewatch in a less than flattering way.  I was facebook creepy one of our customers and they had posted this photo:

 

I wish I could draw like that, I really do.  Maybe next year I'll leave some room in the resolutions for artistic improvement.

I saw Adam on Monday.  He found himself at Sherway after work so rang me up for some company.  His lady friend is returning from India tomorrow so I'm getting some Adam-time in now before he's fully occupado.  I made my way over, and we did some light shopping and got a coffee.  Not actually in Sherway but out-and-around, in the general vicinity.  Knowm' sayin.  So he calls me and for whatever reason my phone rings once and is done.  I love the feature on my phone that texts me my voice messages so in seconds I see his message is to call him, which I do, and he responded with something ridiculous like, "Go for Adam."  Reminded me of the calls I would take when I worked operations in Calgary.  If the right person was calling I'd just pick up and with a somewhat Chicagoan accent say, "Talk to me."

I'm looking into taking ASL classes.  I've always wanted to learn how to sign.  The extent of my current knowledge is an extremely rudimentary alphabet.  Last year during the Toque campaign we sold a toque to a deaf lady.  I would have loved to have been able to have properly communicated.  Though I did manage to sign a thank you at the last minute. I also remember the man Jackie and I met at the Arms.  I think  I managed to get our names out and that was about it, then we switched to pen and paper.  I've kicked it all off with an inquiring email about dates and times and cost.  We'll see what they come back with, and maybe this is something I'll be moving fwd with.

I desperately need time off of work.  We close up on Tuesday at noon and don't have to come back until the following Monday.  Then we're closed on Tues-Wed.  It's going to be awesome.  Technically it's only been 4 mos since I took my last day off, and maybe it's just because this 5 day break is so close that  I'm getting the itch.

I've picked my Jan long read novel.  TBA when I'm done, as if it's exciting to anyone but myself.  I picked up the last of my xmas gifts.  I didn't really go all out at all this year.  Not at all.  I might top off each gift with a $30 gift cert for Canada Helps.  Let the fam make a little donation to their charity of choice. 

I've really been having a great time with my managing my finances with the program I picked up.  Everything is pre-budgeted and this holiday season was a breeze.  I'm building up my reserves dedicated across the board.  I had a few hundred for presents, a few hundy put aside for random car shit.  Which lets face is, is never much less than $400-$500 unless it's routine maintenance.  Once my reserves are built up then the savings really begins.  And by savings I mean passing almost every penny onto my mortgage. (Da-da dah dah)(Da-da dah dah).

I have a new home project.  I need to re-caulk the tub in the en suite.  Rosco has offered to come over if I feel I'm in a jam.  But his second recommendation is to study google videos and get er done.  I think I'm going to go with the latter, and then when I have sufficiently ruined my tub I'll call him.

That's all.  Done.  Done like dinner.  Aint no thing but a chicken wing.
JULIE OUT.

Are You There Internet? It's Me Julie

I don't have much to report, but I'm in a rather good mood today so thought I would type it out.  As always it feels amazing to finish on Fridays at noon.  I went to Canadian Tire and picked up some new wipers.  I feel intimidated doing things for the first time.  I'm not going to be completely anti-feminist and call them guy tasks, but if I had someone around they are tasks I would gladly share/avoid/delegate/not do.  I've never changed a wiper before in my life.  Perhaps once during a car check-up I okayed new ones to go on.  But never by my own hand.  So I've never had to pick out wipers before.  It's rather intimidating.  I wasn't sure if the ones I was getting would fit on properly, or if I could even manage it myself.  After failing to find any useful information in my car's manual I texted Nikki for support.  She's taken on a lot of car duties herself over the years and we've actually talked about her obsession with wipers before.  I've been driving around with the tip of my passenger wiper peeling back, so it just dangles from the rest of it, and leaves a nice thick unsqueegeed patch when I turn them on.....for over a year.  It can sometimes be bothersome, but it's liveable.  But now that snow is coming, and it's borderline unsafe when it rains, I took the plunge.  An almost $50 plunge might I add.  Shameless at work I asked Dean,  "How do I buy windshield wipers?  Is there a brand that's good, or are they all about the same anyways?"  He gave some half-assed advice and now I've got a pair of mid-ranged wipers waiting for me to give them a go tomorrow morning.  I also picked up a new air filter.  And I was going to get some stocking stuffers for my parents - a specialty key for them to cut their new house key on - but I didn't know you needed the key in hand for them to properly size the specialty key.  I've since called my mom and tasked her to go to CT in Cobourg and buy her own stocking stuffer and I'll pay her back.  Wish I could have kept it a surprise, but alas.

I'm going to a party tomorrow, but am going to wait until the weather settles to decide how to get there.  To drive or not to drive.  The good news is, it's less than a 15 minute walk from the GO station, so I can always bus it if need be.  19 would take me right there.  I'm excited to see Dom, but I'm still shocked that he's engaged.  Not that I am particularly involved in Dom's life these days but, it's still a shocker.

I had a fairly amusing text with Adam a while back.  He got a new car.  A cute little bright blue Nissan.  It smells amazing inside.  It syncs with his phone.  It...is...awesome.  When I pulled up next to him I unrolled my window and just blurted excited words towards him.  I found out later he wasn't ignoring me, but the tint required to be not rolled down for 3 days after being installed.  Adam recalled a funny story about getting out of his car to order at a drive thru.  In his defense it was in the wee hours of the morning so going in on foot wasn't an option.  I sent him an admittedly dumb text a few days later, and was quite amused with his response:

Julie: You would not believe who just bought the sickest car.....YOU DID lol
*3 days later*
Adam: Woooo!! Lol delay expert
Julie: Lol who is this?
Adam: Uncle Leo
Adam: ?

I recognized the reference, but must admit I had to google it to appreciate its hilarity in full.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MSrVhfNK2So

That's all for me.  It might be another dirty Cuban rum night.  I really just need to get rid of this stuff, and a waster of alcohol I am not.  My liver needs something to do other than sit there and look pretty.

Byeee.

Bei'rslved

I've been thinking already about my resolutions for next year. And I think I need to start them a little bit early. Nothing too out of the ordinary. Run of the mill resolutions. But good to say them out loud, increase accountability and such (minimally).

1) Start working out, and stick to it this time.
2) Play more guitar. Lots more.
3) Keep up with new recipes, maybe two a month?
4) Reading. I want to try to read a book a week this coming year. Excluding January which will be dedicated to my one long book of choice. I'm flirting with Catch-22. I don't know if it's long enough to qualify but I think the judges will bend the rules just this once.
5) Keep it clean. Car, apartment, life in general.
6) Hang all of my wall art. Post haste. Have no fears about making holes because for once I own the walls.
7) Plan something awesome. TBD

But that's all for now.  Tonight - I drink. Something I haven't done in a very very long time. Rosco brought me some Rum back from Cuba that has been sitting in my trunk for 6 months. And soon it will be in my belly.

Little Red Hot Tamales

There are some things in life that amuse me to no end, and this odd clip from the Jimmy Fallon show is just one of those things.  Aside from the singing, my favourite moment is at 2:15 when Mandy Patinkin just barely musters the ability to say "I'm proud of you."  And every other moment they break character to laugh.  It just kills me.  This has unfortunately just added to my strange obsession with Patinkin.

Too Far

I got an email from Chapters the other day, and I had some time at work so I was doing some browsing.  Thinking about some books I might be interested in reading.  And just yesterday I get an email from Chapters recommending some books to me, and it was the 4-5 books I was browsing at work.  I don't even know how they did that, I guess since I linked to their page through my email it kept a cookie of that?

I find that to be utterly despicable.  A disgusting business practice I want nothing to do with.  It would be like if you went into the store and someone followed you around and took Polaroids of every book you picked up and then mailed the photos to you and said, "Thought you might be interested in some of these books."  F*****g creepsters.  I'm a big fan of Chapters.  I should correct that say I was a big fan.  But after this display they can stuff it.

My House My Rules

I found myself rather annoyed today at work with this kid.  We were somehow talking about Banff National Park and I mentioned how expensive it was, unless you were just driving through, then it's free.  Obviously, it's a park fee not a road toll.  And transport trucks and passing cars need not pay.  He goes, "Yes you do have to pay, unless the toll guy was just ripping us off."  To which I replied, "No you don't, only if you're stopping in the park."  To which he replied, "Yes you do."  So he left, I googled and confirmed what I already knew.  Next time hew as up front I said "Buddy, you don't have to pay, only if you plan on stopping your car in the park.  Because if you stop and leave your car and they find your car without a pass you are EFFED."  To which he replied, "So we're both right."  And I said, "No, I'm right."  And he got all offended.  Then one of the other guys talked about his experience driving up through to Jasper and the question came up which park is larger, so I walked over to our giant Canadian wall map to look.  I assumed Jasper since I think it stretches up the Icefields Highway, but I saw no clear defining borders between the four main parks.  And he walks passed me in a completely passive-aggressive asshole tone says "Oh we need to look at the map."  Or some pissy thing like that.

I usually don't take a hard stance on something unless I feel very confident in what I'm saying.  Which is almost never.  Then the other guys told me to chill out.  Can't win!!

800 envelopes stuffed, 1000 to go.  Probably won't get done in time but for the amount I took I'm sure one day late won't be the end of the world.

I have an embarrassing admission.  I think listening to top 40 at work all day has affected me, and not in a good way.  Now I'm going to preface my next statement by saying I think she's a dirty disgusting human and we'd all be better off if she disappeared into oblivion.  But I love the Miley Cyrus & Jimmy Fallon & The Roots acapella version of her song Can't Stop.  She actually has a pretty amazing voice, which is too bad that she has wasted her talent by being an intolerable wretch.  The guy in the bottom right frame is actually quite amusing to watch.  I know the lyrics are garbage, but I just...can't stop.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2mjvfnUAfyo

That feels good to say out loud, and now if you'll excuse me I think I shall go spiral into a pit of shame.

I'm A Lady You See, Pay Me No Heed

Don't do a double take, this is actually a new post.  For reals.  I'm ashamed of my absence, but I'm back for hopefully a more permanent stay.  Sim and I were email chatting about our blogs today.  It may seem weird but mine means a lot to me.  I've actually been blogging for over 10 years but never stayed in the same spot for quite this long.  3 1/2 yrs so far.  And what started as a successful way to track my trip out East has turned into something thumbs-up for me.

I just got home from shopping at Costco with Nikki.  Her membership ran out last month, and since I got my own membership as an amazing work-perk, I now hold the key to entering.  A new one just opened today up at Dixie and Dundas.  That intersection officially has everything.  And little known fact (read: I didn't know it), it also used to be home to the first Toronto IKEA location.  My mom told me about how she used to drive in from Leaside to shop there, back in the 80s.  I got a notice in the mail about it opening, and what the first week deals were going to be. 40 double rolls of toilet paper for $11.99.  No your eyes do not deceive you.  Reg price: $18.99.  I usually sit around and wait for them to go their regular sale of $14.99, but since I have the space now I bought THREE.  I think my toilet paper situation is covered for a good while.  I also have a toilet paper brand preference - don't judge - and this was that brand so win-win-win.  We walked the cart back to our cars and unloaded.  And I took the cart back to the outdoor cart thing (unlike our lazy neighbour who left his in between two parking spots - jerk).  And as I'm pushing the cart in I feel as if I have stepped on something.  I look down and it's a gooey squeeze pack of apple sauce.  I don't have any on me so it's no big deal.  And then I looked at Nikki who was standing three feet behind me and she has apple sauce ALL over her shoes and up one of her pant legs.  It had squeezed out and flown three feet to the exact spot she was standing.  Total OMG/I'm so sorry moment.   But fairly hilarious, from where I was standing.

What else is new, right.  I'm currently working on a mailing project for Raising the Roof.  They have two main mail outs a year.  Last season I took a bunch home and stuffed them at home.  This year I got a little ambitious and told them to give me as many as they wanted.  Because the information pamphlet boxes come in 900s I got two of those and 2000 of the the rest of the materials to match.  So far I have stickered, stuffed, sealed and stamped 600.  The mail out goal is Friday so we'll see how much I can get done before then.  I actually don't mind it so much.  It takes just over an hour to do 100.  I have to refocus myself, I have lost my focus.  I find myself mildly unfocused and unwilling to refocus on the focusing issue at hand.  The only solution is to focus harder on focusing.  Step 1: Focus.  Step 2: Repeat Step 1.  I think I can do it.

For anyone that knows Sonia, she's married now.  She actually had her first ceremony at Lake Louise with just the families.  The photos are so gorgeous.  She's wearing this hot gold sequin dress.  They both looked smokin.  And it's probably one of the most, if not the most, beautiful sites in Canada so well done Son.  Her second ceremony was downtown at a fancy building beside St Lawrence Market.  It was fun seeing some of the girls from high school.  And then I totally wiped out on a flower petal on the ground and threw my gingerale all over the floor.  It was definitely an all-time top ten classy moment.

Adam just got back from a 2 1/2 week trip to India.  I like to travel vicariously through him, but I think that is just one you have to do on your own.  He said the cities were a shit-show but the rural parts of India were amazing.  I saw some photos and he wasn't lying.  It makes sense if you think about it, geographically.  The Eastern coast looks just like what I would imagine Thailand to be like.  I probably wouldn't have the cash flow to do that for a long time.  I'm still mildly obsessed with making mortgage pre-payments.  Any time I have some available cash it all goes on to that.  Though my budgeting software helps me set aside money for other long term ventures like xmas gifts and car repairs.  The amount of interest that you can save by cutting off the top early is phenomenal, but I need to find a balance between saving on interest and enjoying life.

One last thing - I totally went to the Leafs-Islanders game last week.  A vendor came by and dropped off some ticks, and it went down the totem pole until me and they were still available.  HURRAY.  Centre ice, 16th row, no big deal. I've never been centre before.  The only irritating part is that they pass these GIGANTIC flags over those sections during the national anthem.  And I pretty much missed out on seeing the guy sing O Canada, though I could still hear him.  He was a tenor or something operatic.  The guy beside us was about 6'4, so as the flag passed over head Nikki and I jokingly flapped our hands like infants trying to get at something kept out of reach by the adults.  We won 5-2 by the way, it was awesomeness.

And that's all.  Not much exciting going on.  Though I have been reminded that maybe I don't need anything exciting to flip on over to the bloggie and let my consciousness spew out through my fingers.  That's a nice visual.

And on that note.

Fare thee well.

Old Habits Die Hard, Unless You Kill Them

I only just now realized right at this moment, 5 mos after moving in, that I have been refraining from taking a shower when the washing machine is going.   That didn't stop me from running the dishwasher concurrently but that's only so I can get both loud noises out of the way at once.  I had become so accustomed to not getting full water flow from the bathroom tap until the tank had filled up.  Or being stranded in the shower if the rinse cycle came on.  Life after Winnett is good.

Shake Shake Shake, Senora

After about 5 yrs of wanting one, I have finally bought myself a spice rack.  And I love it!  I thought 12 would be enough but sadly one of the spices has already been Plutoed.  I have an idea of who gets cut next if I happen to pick up a more enticing spice.  We shall see, we shall see.  I'm pretty stoked about my purchase.

And speaking of new things, my mom gave me a housewarming present.  It wasn't a surprise, she included me in the shopping process which I appreciated.  Because I can be persnickety, and get upset if I'm gifted something expensive that I'm not fond of.  Anyways, below is a catalogue shot of the desk.

This thing weighed 88 lbs in the box.  And if you don`t know how much 88 lbs, it`s the equivalent of a metric fuck-ton.  My mom and I had to shimmy it from my trunk to the elevator and then in an attempt to not leave marks on the carpet we did several short lifts from the elevator to my door.  It was a really quick 10 min assembly.  The package came with the alan key required.  Having a desk again is pretty sweet.  Now I just need a floor mat so I don`t roll the life out of this hardwood floor.  And if you're still reading, and I don't blame you if you're not, below is a link to my recipe website.  If I could use an FTP login properly I'd have a really sick recipe website hosted by Sim, but this will do for now.

https://www.myrecipebook.com/recipes/_JulieG

Schnoodles.

Huh?

I'm so directionally challenged that last night I was taking the Hwy 10 exit and I convinced myself I was in a lane heading in the wrong direction, so I switched lanes and drove South instead of North.  Even when I'm right I correct myself to be wrong.  When I first started driving I used to always get really flustered when I had to choose either 401E or 401W.  I eventually solved this by always asking myself if my destination was in the direction of Halifax or Vancouver, but now it just comes naturally.  Thank goodness.  Now if I could just fix the rest of me :/

I must say though, I am very good at renavigating.  If I drive somewhere once I'm really good at being able to find my way back.  Unless it involves an impromptu left/right dilemma.

It feels like forever since I've had a weekend to myself, but it's just been one long weekend for which I was a captive.  This weekend belongs to me.  And I got so excited I double booked.  But instead of cancelling I'm just going to make them both work!  And attempt to do a massive clean-up to boot.  I need to find a better solution to floor cleaning than scrubbing on my hands and knees.  But for the size of the tile space it's working alright, for now.

Second of all, whoa.

Is there a weekly quota on consumption slow cooked meatballs?  If there is, I have surpassed it, and perhaps lapped that mark.  I had plans to meet up with Adam on Friday.  The intent of the meeting was to retrieve my crazy cat lady bag filled with Christmas decorations back from him.  It has really almost been a year since his housewarming on Bloor.  Time sure does fly.  I had assumed we would meet right after I got off work on Friday, but he suggested 1:30pm instead.  I thought I could be a super woman and get all of my cooking done in time for me to leave and meet in time but I was sorely mistaken.  I thought any slow cook meal would be a bunch of chopping, a bit of finesse and voila.  Turns out the meatballs needed to be rolled and then cooked 8 mins on each side.  Then the onions in the sauce had to be sauteed and then brought to a boil with the pasta sauce.  And once all of that was done a careful layering of sauce followed by meatballs, followed by sauce until the slow cooker was full.  I actually filled it really really close to the brim, but I like cooking dangerously.

I finally finished about 75 mins later and had to wait until Adam's next free time which was at 3:30pm.  We met up at a plaza on North Queen which I didn't know existed.  There is a Marshalls and a Tim's and a bunch of other stuff.  We sat in his car as he recounted his tale of a fender bender and his trip plans for India.  I'm only jealous of one of them, and I will let you guess on that one.  I felt kind of pathetic, as my only major news was my recent completion of a new slow cooker recipe.  His bender was pretty bad.  If he goes over a gnarly speed bump the whole front just might fall off.  I had no words for him.  Only an expression of my understanding of his grief.  Owning and maintaining a vehicle can be one of the most stressful things in life, next to standard biggies (death, marriage, money, moving, health, etc.).  There aren't many other purchases that steadily lose their value while costing you hundreds of dollars a month, with the potential for additional thousands at a moment's notice.  And knowing when to let go of a car is also tough.  Calculating the exact moment when you have maximized its financial potential. Being ready to drop another set of Gs with not much warning.  I would have held onto the Civic a bit longer if it didn't have random convulsions while I was on the hwy.  I might have been able to sell it but the e-brake was disconnected, the suspension arm was shot, and apparently the gear shift cord was moments away from snapping.  I would have had to have used my spare key to manually release and shift gears every time.  And my sparks may or may not have been almost completely shot.  Hence the convulsions.  I took an educated guess that it would fail its safety, so I junked it.  I do become attached, regardless of short-comings.  I still miss the Voyager. 0-60 in just under a minute.  Gananoque to Whitby in 10 hrs.  But I'm going to stop writing about this now.  The thought of car failures makes me very upset. 

Speaking of writing, NANWRIMO is coming up again Nov 1.  Last year was an utter failure for me.  I wanted to see how much I could motivate myself.  I think I wrote about 200 words about hating the receptionist at my old job and then gave up.  They want you to go into it completely fresh but I've considered starting a hush-hush brainstorming session now.  Never having written anything in my life before starting from zero is not my ideal.  We'll see how it goes this year.  Probably just about the same as last.

But back to the beginning, the meatballs!  My first slow cooker meal was a total success.  I tried a meatball after it was cooked and before it was slow cooked and it was already the bomb.  I had a good feeling about it.  Tomorrow I'm cooking up some Jambalaya for the first time.  I got the wrong sausage but my mom assured me it won't ruin it, just change the spice level.  Maybe one of these days I will invest in a dutch oven.  I still can't say or read that word without laughing.  Thank you Ren & Stimpy.

If the jamb is any good I'll post the recipe.

JULIE OUT.

Overheard at Work #4 & #5

Back by my own popular demand, two installments of Overheard at Work:

Guy 1:  *getting angry on the phone*...I hate religion anyways.  It's not even about the church.  I'll tell you what it's all about, it's all about fucking aliens.  That's what it's all about.  Don't even get me started.  Ok mom, love you too, bye.

And then earlier today...

Guy 2: *on the phone*...uh huh.....ok.....yep.....uh huh....alright, I know exactly what you mean, thank you.  *hangs up the phone*...I have no idea what he just said to me.

A Pox On You

I think this building dispenses small amounts of crack dust through the central air system.  My mom has even commented to me that she's had some weird dreams, but I think last night took the cake for me.  I hesitate to even put these into writing.  In one of them my dad had a slightly challenged identical twin that showed up at some party at my parents' old house.  And I kept confusing him for my dad if he didn't say anything.  And then I got in our car as we were preparing to leave.  Weird to host a party at a house and then leave yourself while guests are still there but I guess I still have moving issues.  And from outside I was witness to my dad's twin almost running out into the street and getting scared by passing cars.  In my second dream I went back to high school to finish a credit (12 yrs later?) and Katie was there.  And we ran into each other in the bathrooms and she says "oh boy," and I screamed "get out of my fucking life."  That one sums up pretty accurately how I feel about her, except I probably wouldn't have vocalized it quite like that.  But holy weirdness batman.  I think maybe I was oversleeping and that was my brain's way of saying GET UP.  But I'm also partial to the crack dust theory.

Life with mom has been pretty great.  Aside from being displaced from my bed we're having a good time.  She's fairly early to bed most nights so I have time to myself then.  I have someone cooking about half the meals which is something I haven't had since I moved out.  Half the meals, half the trips to the garbage chute.  I'm actually really going to miss her when she leaves.  A lot.

I'm in the middle of a David Gilmour novel, so it's really interesting the controversy that's in the news.  As a prof at U of T he has a balls to tell someone interviewing him that if you're interested in literature by a female author go down the hall because you won't find any in his class.  And to defend that he says he only teaches what he's passionate about and the only female author that he has passion for is Virginia Wolfe so he does one short story of hers.  He likes man's man stuff, whatever that means.  He's not mean-spirited or a misogynist at heart.  He's just an author that for a brief moment forgot how to use his words.  If he had said, "I stack my syllabus with what I'm most passionate about", and if someone questions the lack of female writers he can just say they aren't at the top of his list.  He doesn't have to say they're all at the bottom.  Dumb dumb.  I would like to believe he's just lying to himself.  I think there is a lot of crossover between genders and writing styles.  Anyways, that's a whole other thing.  I'm going to finish this book, because it's effin good, and raspberry to that.

Our family is flirting with the idea of going North for Thanksgiving again.  If the weather dips down into the single digits it's not going to be a very pleasant experience.  We might just go up on Saturday, close er up, hit up the Haliburton Studio Tours, and then head back down for an inaugural  Thanksgiving in C-burg.

I guess my last piece of news, is that we all have to be very very careful with our privacy and our money.  My dad recently had his work email hacked, and the effin effers used information from his email account to draft a letter to his financial advisor asking him to transfer all of his retirement savings into a different account.  Obviously the advisor said uhhh, no.  But the letter they drafted mentioned C-burg, it mentioned an upcoming trip to California my mom is taking.  Although they got it wrong and thought the itinerary was for my dad.  It's creepy, it's invasive, and it could happen to ANYONE.  They also used his contact list to send out an email asking them to log into a website to view a google doc about wealth management, in an attempt to ascertain their email account information.  And then they deleted his contact list so he couldn't send out a blast for them to ignore it.  That's why I operate without a contact list.  It might be a little bit inconvenient sometimes, but it's worth the peace of mind.  I had a fucking conniption when I found out it wasn't just a spam attack but something much more serious.  If the a-holes that did it weren't in Kuala Lumpur I would go fuck their days up.  It made me realize that it was only slightly targeted, and this could be happening dozens or hundreds of times a day.  And you only find out when your account is suddenly empty.  I'm getting angry again just thinking about it.  A pox on you, Malaysians.  But not all of you, just the jerky ones.

That's all from me.  Byeeee.

That Time My Mom Moved In

I have a house guest staying with me.  I`ll give you some hints.  She's a bit shorter than me.  We have the same eye colour.  And oh yes, she gave birth to me.  I can hear her lightly snoring in the next room as we speak.  It's almost soothing, like one of those sound machines that plays the sound of the ocean.  She moved in two weeks ago and things have been great.  She's picking up the grocery bills, so I'm eating all sorts of weird and wonderful foods I am far to cheap to ever buy for myself.  Blood Orange SanPellegrino is just about the tastiest thing I have ever had, ever.  Yerrrr-my.

My mom dropped the bomb on me yesterday that she's staying tomorrow night as well.  Fridays and Saturdays have become my own days to unwind.  And when I say have become I mean one time, but now this week I will have one more night on the blow-up mattress.  I usually switch between the mattress and my 2-seater couch throughout the week.  Sometimes I sleep better all curled up.  Or as curled as I can get, which in all honesty isn't very curled.  I half-invited myself to join my mom this weekend for an excursion to Uxbridge.  But logistically that could mean spending Saturday night in Cobourg and coming home to the mattress, without ever having a night of reprieve in my own bed.  My mom offers constantly to take the air mattress but I refuse.  Mama Bear gets the bed that's just right in this story.  And since I'm also going away next weekend that would total 3 straight weeks without a night's rest.  Isn't life so tough??

We've had a few small accomplishments since my mom moved in.  I finally got all the pieces from Nikki to set up my internet as wireless.  At first it wasn't working, and even messing around on the administration page didn't help.  I felt like a failure until Nikki told me all that was required was plugging it into the wall.  So a day later I tried again and bam, success.  I did hop back into admin to add a password though.  Too many neighbours in close proximity to steal my 'widths.  My mom said, "This is great, so any time I stay over I can bring my laptop and have access."  I said in return, "Lets wait until you're not a house guest to talk about visits, k?"  And also just tonight I downloaded the Netflix channel for Wii.  I find it harder to navigate than online, but perhaps only because I am accustomed to it.  On top of those wireless achievements I got this place into about the 80% clean percentile.  I don't really know how I lived for the past few months with sooo much junk everywhere.  There are still remnants of junk.  My mom likes to comment about how nice it could look if I would just.....and I like to cut her off there and tell her to stuff a sock in it.

Speaking of sock stuffing, the gems that bought my parents' house have turned out to be thieving bastards.  Luckily as their claim of a wet carpet unraveled it was determined they felt the carpeting company had installed the carpet into a wet environment.  Ergo my parents have no responsibility.  Hopefully it stays that way.  And the carpet company will tell those two it was bone dry and where they can stuff it.  Any damage after closing is their own.  I told my dad if they manage to hold him responsible for any dollar value I will defecate on their property and in their pool until I feel their grief is on par with my parents.  I hope it doesn't come to that.

With that joyful tidbit I bid the internet adieu for the night.  Sleep tight internet, sleep tight.

See You In September

September is upon us, and it's already a subpar month.  My air conditioning is officially broken.  I did some master googling and found that the air filter might be the problem.  So I crossed my fingers, bought a new filter and started her up again.  And within minutes it was once again blowing hot air.  The good news is that it starts with cold.  Which might limit the possibilities for potential damage in a good way.  But what do I know.  I've asked a friend of mine with an HVACing husband to give me some hot tips.  Until then I will have to hope the days stay moderately cool.  Especially since starting tomorrow there will be two bodies creating heat in this apartment.

I went back out to Cobourg today, to give my parents a hand and wish my father happy birthday.  We drove out to Newcastle to start emptying their rented storage unit.  I got a bit angry with them a week ago when I found out they hadn't made a payment on the unit.  I was like, "HAVEN'T YOU SEEN STORAGE WARS???  Cause they're making a Canadian version.  And you don't want to see yourself on it."  After we got back to the house, my mom and I continued to unpack and my dad went back for a second trip.  Overall they were trying to trim down on furniture, they also bought new really nice new china cabinets.  Some old family china that used to be closed up in boxes is finally on display.  After lunch and a bit of chatting I got on the road back home.  Although I'll have the weekends to myself, tonight is my last night alone for a long time.  Breath in, breath out.

The good news is I'm going to use my mom to help me finish a few projects around the house.  Including buying and setting up a new desk.  And perhaps getting some old stuff into boxes and down into my storage locker.  At least this is the final push I need to get everything here put away and in order.  And she might give me the push I need to get some bar stools.

In other news, I rolled my own sushi last night and it was AMAZING.  Oh I can't wait to get that going again.  And for next time Kyle has recommended a butcher we can pick up some sushi grade ahi tuna.  Soon we'll be consummate professionals.  Sayonara.

The Deadly Threes

Sim's right, everything bad strikes in threes.  I had no idea I could murder this dinner so fabulously.

1) I defrosted a steak last night so I'm cooking it in tandem so I can refreeze it again or take it for lunch tomorrow.  I got home at about 5:30 after doing some chores.  Before I started the chili I put turned the oven on and put the steak in.  Making sure to check the time it went in.  355.  Halfway through the chili prep I looked back at the oven....355.  And it's the temperature, for the WIN.

2) I turned on the front burner to start my rice and when I went to pour my first ingredients into the stewing pot it sizzled.  Making this mistake while cooking on multiple elements is how I ended up exploding my medium sized lid.  Lesson not learned.

3) I didn't buy an onion because I had one.  I knew it was probably old and I'd be pushing it slightly.  Onion was moldy so into the garbage it goes, and I have a week of chili sans onion.  OMG.  I think tomorrow I'm going to pick up an onion to cook up and add.  It just won't be the same.

How I Learned To Stop Spending And Love The Budget

I should probably start by saying I have technically cheated in the matter of my monthly budget goal, but in heart and spirit I put up a very good fight.  And it's not even over yet!!

Ways that I have cheated myself (and you):
- My parents fed me dinner once
- My mom fed me lunch once
- I found $5.50 and recalculated my budget allowance up to $40.50
- I got an oil change and put it on credit, but only because I'm driving to Cobourg tomorrow and don't want any funny business on the way, or on the way back.  Otherwise I could have waited until September.
- In return for helping my parents move they are paying for my gas there and back, but I would have had enough for work if I put in my last $5.

Ways that I have succeeded and feel great about myself:
- I didn't spend any money last week, none...noooonnne.
- I ate out of my freezer, a lot.  And, errrr, had a few more spaghetti dinners than is deemed acceptable for someone in their 30s.
- I went and picked up fixins for dinner and some healthy pancakes and only spent.....$35.50.  And that includes my special gift to myself of parm cheese which I had just run out of (*cough* too many spaghetti dinners *cough cough*) and some marble cheese for snacking.  Those two alone came to about $12.  And the meat alone was $12.  Whatever, I'm feeling pretty good about it all.
- My tire broke and I went back to the place I bought it and they fixed it for freeee, yeeaaaah.

I was hoping to have about $7 so I could stop for a subway on Friday after work.  Maybe if I get my car scrounge on I can make it happen.  If not it's going to be me and a LOT of Flatlander Chili for the next 4 days.

I'm On A Boat And....

Some pics from my inaugural boat cruise.  I hate to admit that the picture at the steering wheel was posed.  We were anchored at the time.  So much for photojournalistic integrity.

 

Monkey Blood = Bad

Alright, so I was feeling pretty good about myself.  With some light pressure from Nikki I decided it was time to give blood, or at least try.  If anything I was worried my blood pressure would be too high and I wouldn't pass the screening.  I passed the screening, after the nurse nearly ripped both arms off taking my pressure.  I haven't sold myself into prostitution or taken any lovers that have engaged in high risk activities (in the past six mos, ha).  I got onto the chair, finally, and they couldn't find a bloody vein.  No pun intended.  The nurse walked me to the cool down station, and I removed my first time donor sticker because it was officially a farse. The nurse told me to sit down and enjoy their refreshment area.  I kindly declined.  I wasn't going to hang around after not giving blood and make an even bigger fool of myself.  I can go back at any time and try again when I'm better hydrated.  I really didn't drink much at all today.  At least I will always have the chance to try again, unless I make contact with a monkey.  Monkeys = black listing for life.

I have been keeping busy.  Last weekend I finally got the chance to go out on my dad's boat for a cruise.  We zooted up to Toronto Island and anchored off and had a little picnic on board.  We normally enter Toronto Harbour using the Western gap as it's closest to the little anchoring bay.  On the way out we left through the Eastern gap over by Cherry Beach and the Leslie Spit.  We had the occasion to pass the nude beach.  There were a TON of boats anchored off right off from the beach.  Like, a highly amusing amount of boats.  All there for a little look-see I suppose?

I went into TO once for Sim's games night and another time to get coffee with Adam.  Both were highly enjoyable.  Good times.

I'm looking into getting some budgeting software to help me with my woes.  I don't think I'm in any severe trouble but I'm having an increasingly difficult time managing my money.  When I rented (and I was employed) I was always so flush.  The money just kept pouring in and I barely had a care in the world.  Now from the money I've put aside for food and gas, I have $35 dollars left to last me until the end of the month.  I'm considering picking up some fixins for a delish chili recipe Sim passed along.  That might run me less than $20 and last me for a handful of meals.  Oh the woes.

I'm off to meet Nikki for some light shopping.  As in I will be watching as she shops.

Let Me Tell You Your Fortune

I could have told you four years ago that Wallin and Duffy were a bad idea.


Also, free mobile internet for the win.

LEARN HOW TO DRIVE, pls.

So this is what happened.  In the below beautiful graphic, I am the grey car.  The other random driving victim was in green, and the biggest douche bag asshole driver in Mississauga is in red.  From the below it's pretty clear that the grey and green car have the right of way.  Without even stopping, the red truck rolled out into the street and almost t-boned me.  I literally had no time to react and can only be thankful that Mr. Brilliant slammed on his brakes, which left him flush to be in a head-on with the green car.  Lucky for him the green car slowed down too.  I saw the red car but would have never guessed in a million years that he would just roll, and in fact accelerate through a stop sign onto a main street.  I may have been saved by the over-sized lanes and my ability to veer slightly to the right.  Wanker, wanker, wanker.  I'm done.

What comes after Turkey?

My new fitness routine is to play Wii  Sports every day.  Every day I'm home and don't have a life, which can either be surprisingly infrequent or depressingly frequent.  I now know what comes after a Turkey in bowling.  It's called a Fourth, and this bitch got one....in the land of Wii bowling at least.  It's almost ironic how my virtual bowling mimics my actual bowling.  I release too late and the ball goes flying with a loud smack as it lands.  And my virtual % of backwards bowls matches up to real life pretty well.

Eventually I'll start biking again and really get this going.

When I bought this Wii yesterday I ended up returning thinking it was broken.  The guy at the store even drove to another store to pick a replacement up.  Yeah.  Brought the second one home and it was not working in the same way.  Then I realized the machine wasn't broken at all.  In my defense, it was almost impossible for me to know that if you hooked the AV cords up wrong on this tv the product would result in a B&W image instead of no image at all.  The disc being upside down, that was all on me.  All on me.  The ultra kicker is that when I went to my local EB they didn't have the Wii so I had to drive to Meadowvale to pick it up.  And then back to MV again when I got a case of the dumb dumbs.

I pooped out of going up North last night.  Severe Thunderstorm warning persuaded me to stay in town.  But now I am off.  For a glorious 4-day weekend away.  Wahoo.

Closing Time

I lost a small part of myself a week ago when my parents finally closed on their house.  My brother tried to one-up my sadness by saying "I lived here longer than you did."  I wasn't in much of a mood for a pissing match so I let him have it.  I left home when I was 18 but went back for many summers, and a year after uni, and a year after Calgary.  I've been visiting fairly regularly in the past two weeks to help my parents with the final push on packing up their belongings.   On Saturday they moved into their temporary living situation, and the movers came on Monday and emptied the entire house.   I brought over my vacuum so they could do one final last clean, but the movers were pros and left theirs out until the last load.  The lead mover was absolutely stunningly gorgeous.  Oh, he was What's the word? - Gorgeous? Hands off! I seen him first! Oh, he was lush!  My mom and I sat out on the back patio and had a moment.  And then we hugged out front and I drove away.  I don't think I'll be able to go back any time soon, and see unfamiliar cars in the driveway.  That chapter in my life is closed.

I'm on vacation this week, weeeee.  It's the first time off I'd had since last September.  On Friday I had this sort of longing feeling, like I was going to miss work come Tuesday.  But now it's Tuesday and all I can think about is doing absolutely nothing, and loving every second of it.  I woke up on Saturday with a vicious irritated bowel.  I don't want to give too many gruesome details but it ended with me clutching the garbage can so I could vomit at the same time.  Not a great way to start your weekend, at 5:30am.  There may be a culprit.  The weekend before I had the same fiery experience after eating some leftover meat that was apparently expired.  I like to say I only make those mistakes once but it appears I need to make that mistakes with each food group individually (first eggs, now steak).  I somehow managed to get my shit together, literally, and got out to see a movie with Kyle.  Now You See Me, good times.  It was a really clever movie, although Kyle said he figured most of it out early on, I'm a dummy so it kept me guessing almost all the way through.  I had a few small mental victories.  Add to that a quick trip to the Arms yesterday to see Jackie's gang, and I've spent most of the rest of my time melting into a pile of nothingness.

I'm on my way up to Heartland today to meet up with an old colleague.  She's still with the company we worked at together, and has been effed by them much in the same way I was.  Only difference is, I called Uncle and she's stuck it out.  A job that closely matches my old job with them has come up, and as it's permanent she's going for it.  I'm doing the best I can to prep her for the interview.  Give her the inside scoop on what the job entails, etc.  And if I have time I'm going to stop into Future Shop and get myself a Wii!!!!!  This is very exciting news for me.  I found $110 in gift cards during the move, and with a little help from a bonus we rec'd this month I'm going to get myself something shiny and new.  I don't know why I always wait so long and deprive myself of nice things.  This is going to be a good one.

And then tomorrow I'm hitting the road and heading up to the cottage for a few days.  I think I'll just pack a giant pile of books, and sit out on the deck and read.  I might take a few dips in the lake if the weather is nice enough.  Make nice with the chipmunk again.  Do some bbqing.  Nothing will beat those amazing steaks my dad stocked the freezer with last time, but it will be nice to eat anything off the grill.

Countdown to mom's move-in is looming.  It's about 4 weeks off so I won't start anything official.  But I think the walls just got a bit smaller as soon as I typed that.  Oxygen level in air....slowly depleting....can't....breathe........oh it's going to be an interesting two months.  But she did birth me, so I can't put up much of a fight.  Although, I think after this we'll be even lol.

19 and Counting

I left my house yesterday morning and was filled with a mild feeling of dread when I pressed the elevator button and it did not light up.  I could hear the industrial fans in the elevator shaft, obviously trying to dry out the results of the previous night's flooding.  Having walked down 23 flights at my office in Calgary I knew it wouldn't be a problem here.  The flights are actually nice and small, with single flights between floors.  My only concern was my timing.  I still made it to work with about 5 minutes to spare, thanks to my new earlier schedule.

I did some grocery shopping after work.  I've been on the hunt for my favourite salad dressing that was always stocked at the Forest Hills Loblaws.  I searched down their website and went to three local distributors but they had no record of selling their product.  I've sent their customer service an email to ask for up-to-date recommendations.  Mmmmmm good.  Having struck out at yet another grocery I decided to pick up a few items.  Which turned into a full bag's worth.  When I got home I ran in to see if the elevator was working yet to gauge how many groceries I was willing to carry, should I have to take the stairs.  Up just the first flight, I looked around a corner and down a hall and I could see the outside.  There was a slight cool breeze I could feel against my cheek.  As I turned to look up at my pending doom I could feel myself already suffocating.  A concrete torture chamber awaited me, and I had to inflict that pain upon myself willingly.

Long story short I made it up all 20 flights, or I guess it's actually just 19 flights to get from P1 up to my place.  I really started to lose hope at floor 6.  At floor 9 I gave up and sat down, the first of many rests I would take (might have even been my second rest...yeah).  From then on out it was 2-3 flights at a time, followed by a short rest.  As I got higher up my main motivation was to not get lapped by anyone.  I knew those chances would decrease the more I pushed on through.  Someone did lap me at floor 15 I sat dripping with sweat catching my breath.  I'm well aware I'm massively out of shape.  I don't need a 19 flight stair climb to prove it to me.

When I got on the elevator today (hallelujah) the guy beside me had pressed two.  When I went for nineteen he said "That flood must have been rough for you."  It was...it was.  I could still feel the burn in my legs today at work.  Kind of pathetic.  But it almost makes me want to attempt one climb a week.  Until it's no longer painful.  And under normal circumstances I can always give up and take the elevator the rest of the way.  Horrible motivation.  At least I did better than my brother who had to walk down 50 flights of stairs and walk almost an hour in the pouring rain in an Italian suit.

 Zee End.

The Night The Lights Went Out

A 3hr power outage is certainly a good wake-up call for electricity dependency.  I guess I can now say with certainty that one thing I miss about Winnett was gas powered everything.  When the power went out I could still flush the toilet.  I'm now learning that is a novelty.  30 minutes in I texted Nikki, I'm boorrrrreeeed.  Sad but true.

I went to the dentist today after work.  No cavities, SCORE.  I have been a bit better at flossing but I attribute my success to my new toothbrush, and maybe my new paste.  Although the paste is pretty disgusting and made me throw up the first two or three times I used it.  The granular gel seems to be effective.  After that I hit up Oceans South of Eglinton to see if they carry this salad dressing I've been hunting for.  The corporate website said they bought it but I couldn't find it.  I settled for some cheap in-store sushi and headed back home.  I wasn't home for 45 minutes before a giant flash from behind my curtains caught my attention.  And 10 minutes in from that the lights were out, and the emergency alarm started to blare.  Not that I shouldn't have already known this but in the past few weeks I took notice of the button on my bedroom wall that reads "push button to silence alarm", and boy am I glad I found that button.  The front desk kept providing directions over the emergency speaker system and then they would run the alarm again requiring me to get up and silence it each time.  Rather annoying but I suppose the small price to pay for personal safety.  We started to get aural notices that the parking garage was flooding.  I didn't know what to do.  My car is parked up a slight incline and I kind of thought I would be safe.  Assuming all water would flow down towards P2 and P3.  I stuck it out for one more announcement where the desk guy said only South tower needed to evacuate their cars.  And then finally the third announcement said the flood was being fixed.  I'm still kind of anxious to go down and find out how far the water went up, even though I know it was safe.

I did get the chance to meet my neighbour.  We were both sitting outside basking in the last bits of daylight.  Although the sky was completely overcast and not providing much comfort.  The lights on Hwy 10 were out and the traffic started to back up as drivers struggled to treat each intersection as a 4-way stop.  We chatted across the privacy barrier.  She's a cake decorator at a prominent grocery store chain.  Her parents live out towards Miss-Etobicoke border.  And she has an insane attention to detail that few could rival.  I'll tell you how I knew my car was safe, because she told me.  She told me the same moment that she first met me.  When I asked how P1 was she said my car was ok, and at the same time we said "Silver Sebring", and then she said, "Yes, Silver Sebring, 9 spots up."  I wanted to throw a box of toothpicks to the ground to see if she how quickly she could count them.  It was uncanny.

I feel like I'm behind on updating.  Lots of stuff happens in life that I want to keep track of but I'm le tired most of the time.  Jackie came into town for a few nights so that was amaaaazing to see her.  She was looking smoking hot, yes you were Jak.  You're a fit little karate master now.  Nik and I took a few nights up north.  We're having some septic problems, so not sure how that's going to be for the rest of the summer.  Spring floods in Minden have reeked havoc on the water table.  Work is still good.  As long as they still want me I'll be staying there.  Also on the long weekend Friday Nik and I went to see a filming of a new CTV show, Spun Out.  With the amazing Dave Foley.  He walked out to the audience and said some hellos and then with no warning spun around and dropped back while yelling "TRUST EXPERIMENT."  It was pretty awesome.  We're going again this Friday.  Except this time Nikki doesn't have the afternoon off so I'll have to wait all by myself.  Ideally I would have a complete cessation of this damn nagging cough so I could properly laugh without risk of following that with a loud disturbing cough.  We'll see how the cards fall on that one.

Oh and when the lights were all out, I got a call to let me know my credit card had been compromised.  Some assnut decided it would be a good idea to be a good for nothing shit-head and steal my card number and try to run a transaction online at cash convertors.  It's a well known scammer's trick to run small transaction values to see what gets approved and then take those cards and run larger values.  It's ironic I was just looking at my card balance the other day and thinking how amazing it was how low I'd kept my purchases this month.  At least it will be easy enough for me to spot anything that isn't mine.  The same scam happened at the charity I worked at.  Some poo-brain got a bunch of card numbers and ran hundreds of $5 donations on their website.  The police came by their office to get more information.  I remember being there later that day, and telling my coordinator they should probably send the fire men too, just in case.  No such luck.

My parents are moving in 3 weeks.  I think if I start crying now I should be ready to accept it as a reality by the time the move comes.  The place hasn't looked itself in weeks though.  Boxes everywhere.  Furniture moved into corners of rooms.  I'm not ready to say goodbye.  But the reality is I'd probably never feel ready.  I also don't want my security blanket to move to Cobourg, but it is, so tough cookies for me.  And by the time I get done with my mom living here for 2 months, I'd probably be ready to post her all the way to Iqaluit.  Should I back up a moment and confirm that yes my mother has decided she would like to live with me for 2 months while she finishes out her career, before she retires and moves to the new house with my father?  She acts like it won't be a big deal.  "I'll sleep on the couch", she says.  Like I would let my mother sleep on this two seater couch for two months.  I'm probably going to have to get a blow up mattress.  At least then I would have something for any future crashers.  I'm annoyed, but I just have to think of it as having a live-in chef for two months.

So that's about it.  I was actually thinking about blogging right before the lights went out.  And then when they came back on there was this audible cheer coming from the balcony.  I opened my door and people in high rises all over the neighbourhood were hootin and hollerin to celebrate the return of our new age life source.  And that kind of made me want to blog too.  I hate the word blog.  I do.

Blog out.

Roooooooof

And As It Is Such So Also As Such Is It Unto You

Life goes on.  Slowly I become more unpacked.  And now that my parents have sold their house, I have started to accumulate even more "stuff" from them.  I should really wonder where all my money in life went because as I look around my place very few things are mine.  About 50% were gifted to me.  Another 40% were bogarted (my newest bogarsition is a set of patio chairs for my newww patio, thank you m&d).  And the last 10% I may or may not have been involved in contribution money towards its purchase.  So why am I not a bajillionaire?  I told Nikki, almost joking, I wanted to go on a cash diet like that lady on tv does to her indebted participants.  I do cash sometimes, but then I also do credit.  And if my chip doesn't work I do debit.  I'm all across the board.

I got my first property tax bill in the mail the other day.  Property tax + maintenance fees = $700.  My interest on this place is probably about $500 a month.  So I'm officially losing money lol.  And with the $60 insurance increase I'm losing even more money.  It's all a scam.  I can't leave this place until it has appreciated more than the cost of selling or I'm a dummy.  I'm starting to see a bit more clearly why people have trouble with finances and find it to be such an overwhelming burden.  SHEEESH.

Adam got his G license today.  I'm so very proud of him, since I failed 2x before they finally took mercy on me.  It's hard to tell that story and still convince people I'm a good driver.  I swear I am.  I know I'm at least better than two people I encountered recently.  Yesterday this woman (in a beamer, no comment *cough*) backed her car into someone in a parking lot that was driving through the aisles.  She immediately exited her car and proceeded to yell at the gentleman who got hit.  "Didn't you see me backing up??!!?!?!  I was backing up, didn't you see me???"  I wanted to cup my hands to my mouth and yell across the parking lot "You're wrrroooonnnnggg" but I managed to keep it to myself.  She looked like the type that would sprint across the parking lot and gash my face open.  Then today I'm doing a bank run, and a small office shop and there's been an accident at Dixie and Eastgate.  One car is left in the intersection, but he's pulled just far enough through so that the two Southbound lanes can manage to get by him.  And anyone turning North onto Dixie can just swing a bit wide and manage past.  Most people have no issue with this.  Then suddenly I can hear a gentleman getting progressively more upset as he approaches the intersection.  It really made no sense.  Accidents happen all the time, and unlike some accidents that take up lanes and cause traffic to back up for hours, this was one of the least imposing traffic incidents I've encountered.  The guy pulls around the stopped car and as he comes around the other side he is now screeeaming at the top of his lungs, "Ucking Mother Uckerssss!"  I went back to work and relayed this story to my coworkers and added that, if that moment was the worst thing that happened to him today, he should be pretty happy about that.  And not cursing the world.  I'll be the first to admit I get a bit angry behind the wheel but within the confounds of my car, and usually with the windows up.

But moving on from that.  I finally got the blue rubbermaids from my move unpacked.  My mom asked to use them for her own move so I had some motivation to get going.   And now for the rest of it.  I'm also going to pick up my housewarming present tomorrow.  After I finally get my license changed over to the proper address.  The Service Ontario website claims you have 6 days.  So I'm a bit late, but better late than never.  And then when I'm finally all unpacked I can finally clean, which I have not done since I got here o_O  I also spilled a litre of vinegar in my trunk so I might need to go get some more to get the job done.  At least that helped cover up the stench of washer fluid I spilled the week previous ^_^

Ciaosies

Allegator Assassinator

Back by singular demand, my droning somewhat insignificant updates on my uneventful life.  What is this self-esteem of which you speak?

The eagle has landed, in Mississauga!  It feels dirty to say it out loud, but Mississauga doesn't have to be awesome, I will make it as such.  I'll miss being close to Sim and Sarah, late night coffees with Adam, the Annex, 24-hr transit, relatively cheap insurance (who knew).  I miss my volunteering as well.  I'll finally get the full benefit of half day Fridays, but it's a little sad to say goodbye.  But I won't miss my old apartment.  I thought I would have separation anxiety but I quickly overcame that as I locked up for the last time and walked down the uneven front steps.

Now, things that are awesome about my new living situation:
1) My awesome piece of art is no longer in my parents' basement and is hanging proudly on my wall.
2) I have a balcony....niiiiche.
3) I can burp and fart at will without wondering if anyone overheard me and is judging me.
4) I can play my laptop and tv without feeling like I'm being obnoxiously loud - so long headphones.
5) I'm 15 minutes from work....one-five.
6) At least for the summer, I'll be 10 minutes from my parents.  And yes, they have officially listed the house.  I have one last summer to soak it all in.
7) And lastly, I no longer have to walk half way around my apartment in the middle of the night to use the washroom because I have an en suite bathroom!  And also I'm sleeping like a baby.  My alarm goes off at 6:30 and I no longer feel the need to snooze.  I'm not a morning person yet, per se, but it's an improvement.  It's marvelous, on both accounts.

Well lets see what has been going on.  Annual May 2-4 trip up North.  Bachelorette and Wedding for Sarah.  I got my hair did for the latter.  I have to say the front looked like a bad comb-over but the back was hot shit.  Last night out in Toronto with S&S at Dave's.  I moved.  Inaugural M-town outing with fellow M-towners.  And today I met up with a visiting Adam for coffee followed by riiiibs with Nikki.  We used up the last of what was available on my Christmas gift card from the bosses at Swiss Chalet.  Nom nom nom.  I'm going up North this weekend as well.  Mostly because I left some steak in the fridge which will be right rank by now.  I'm not always very comfortable sleeping alone up there.  I don't even like sleeping alone when I'm house sitting for my parents.  I'm a paranoid freak sometimes.  And next weekend I'm going to see Dom do his first running event, on the Pearson tarmac, followed by a party in town.  Life is....ok?

9 mos on the job and so far so good.  I'm looking forward to my one year so I can finally take some time off.  You'd think the year + previous where I sat at home most all day every day would have satiated my need for relaxation, but it doesn't work that way.  I'm not dying, but I could go for some down time.

Jak - don't think I've forgotten about your visit home.  I've been thinking about it since you texted me the dates.  I can't wait to see you.  FA-SERIOUS.  Remember that time you hijacked my computer and had a very confusing convo with my brother about ice cream?  I can't remember if you were on team cone or team bowl, fa-serious.

And, uhhh, that's about all.  I'll try to not disappear for months at a time going fwd.

Boom Goes The Dynamite.

I had this funny starter line in my head a few days ago, but that's what I get for not writing things down as they come to me.  My thought-a-day journal has also been grossly neglected.  Grossly.

I've started to do some packing today.  I did some light packing a few weeks ago but nothing since.  And the big day is fast approaching.  In just over two weeks I will own a home.  And by the way, it's a collateral mortgage.  Good thing I have no intention of switching mid-mortgage to a new provider but as Sim predicted my banker gave me no information about the mortgage, and didn't even provide an alternative.  How am I supposed to know?  I also passed on mortgage insurance.  If I'm so disabled I can't work, I'm sorry but mom and dad I'm moving back home.  And we can sell the condo.  My coworker that went through cancer treatments for 7 weeks was denied mortgage insurance coverage.  Cancer.  It's ironic, he's lucky the cancer spread to his lymph nodes because then it was deemed to be in more than one location and he qualified for coverage.  WTF good is insurance that doesn't cover you for 7 weeks of radiation/chemotherapy just because the cancer has remained local.  My banker has also signed me up to have my property tax paid by the bank.  It's a nominal fee of $25 which I probably would have paid if he had asked me first.  But I don't like having something just added in there so I told him to take it off.  Why guess at what I want when we can have a 5 second conversation and I can tell you.  It's been an extremely frustrating process.  Almost over.

I miss Toronto already and I haven't even left.  I'm tricking myself and thinking I will miss this place.  When everything is quiet and the temperature is just right, I love this place to death.   My hardwood castle.  This desk sits just right so I can swing to the side and put my feet up on the single chair to my left.  The only window I frequently use has a crank handle (which I shouldn't consider a blessing but I do).  In the summer time I can open all the windows in the house and have the most wonderful draft.  I think I'll miss those drafts most of all.  And not feeling like I'm a sardine living in a corporate housing machine.  How could a shoe box actually cost that much money?  When did charging that much money become acceptable??  It was the best life step for me, and the place is goorrrgeous.  And in all honesty I'm not going to miss this place at all.  The noise, the lack of privacy, the internet shutting off at random times, the blown fuses in the winter.  That time when my landlord's monoxide alarm beeped every 15 minutes to alert that the battery was running out.  And a day later it went into double beeping, and then one more day later he finally got home to shut it off.  I won't miss that.  It kind of hit me all at once how much I had to put up with here.  Sim's been telling me for years this guy is a slumlord but I didn't quite believe it.  He'll find out exactly how I feel when I shame him with my parting letter.  I shouldn't be scared of leaving this place.  I made a life for myself in Calgary, and then in Toronto, and I can do the same in Mississauga.

Nothing much else new is going on.  So...laters.

A Recipe for Success

1) Invite willing guests (check)
2) Select an appropriate meal (check)
3) Gather all the necessary fixins (check)
4) Ensure you distribute your home address properly so your guests can find you...........

5) Tell everyone your ACTUAL address (check)
6) Good food (check)
7) Good wine (check)
8) Good times (check check)

Underneath the Moonlight, The Moonlight

I think I've taken a sufficient break to recover from over-bloggation.  I just needed some air.

My landlord has started to show my apartment.  I thought someone would snap it up fairly quickly.  And then I looked up the posting and found out he's trying to rent this place for $1400.  May a take a moment to laugh at his inconceivable greed???  I pay less than $1150 right now, just to give you a basic idea.  Rent hikes have been fairly restrictive these past few years.  Even if I was incredibly liberal and said $15 a year, it would still come in at shy of $1200.  What a greedy bastard.  I hope because of that he doesn't rent it for several months.  I'm mentally preparing the scathing email I'm going to send him.  The more I think about the time I've lived here the more it eats away at it.  In particular one line he said in a text was, "Even after a lot of work your place will be in rough shape."  Well buddy, why didn't you try to do something about that when I was living here??  I'm censoring myself, but the mental version includes a lot more profanity.  Also he took a photo of my "new kitchen" and posted it on the Craiglist posting.  He's such a turd burglar.  He hasn't even filled in the grouting because he's a lazy sack of excrement.

Also check out the lovely mess he left on my steps a few weeks ago.  I got a text at noon on Friday, "Oops, I left without cleaning up the steps.  I'll get them soon."  He didn't clear them until Sunday at noon.  I also got a follow up text at 5:30 telling me he had painted the back of the steps so watch my shoes, to which I replied, "I'm already upstairs." To which I wanted to reply, "I'm already upstairs you stupid shithead."  That stupid little fuck.  I'd like to ruin his life if possible so he can be as miserable as I am right now.

Calm blue ocean, one more month and I'm out of here.  I've been finding a lot of cool stuff as I've been cleaning up.  I picked up some organizers at Staples and have properly split up all of my bills and records that I keep.  They used to be all jumbled half stuffed into one divider that could no longer properly close.  So I picked up 4 or 5 smaller ones and split them up by type.  Bills, employment, taxes, etc.  I'm pretty pleased with the new system.  And spread across my entire apartment and after a clean out of my car I have located almost every single Rogers bill I rec'd in the last 3 years.  As well as most of my paystubs dating back to 2009.

I also found a gift card for Montanas which I used with Nikki.  We got all you can eat ribs, but let me tell you, neither of us could eat them all.  We didn't even make it through the first rack.  I embarrassingly asked if they could only charge us for the rack instead of the all-you-can eat, even though it's only $1 more.  It's the principle.  He made it sound like he was doing us a favour, but if he had said no I would have ordered seconds for the pure purpose of costing them money.  Seriously, don't piss me off.  And now I'm not super keen on going back.  Prick.

I also found this super amazing Christmas card that Jackie sent me.  The best part was the cartoon of her being a Mountie whilst double sworded jousting.  Which was purportedly a bad idea but it looks pretty boss to me.  We always had this idea of doing a comic together.  It started with our road trip to BC back in 2008.  As I was driving she leaned forward and tilted my stress piggy that sat on the dashboard.  She pushed it until it was staring directly into my soul.  And hence was born the first one frame comic idea.  "STOP LOOKING AT ME, PIGGGGY".  We realized it would never make sense to anyone else and thus never came to fruition but it start something we've both been sitting on for a while.  I've been toying with a different idea but I haven't decided if it's lame or not so I'm going to keep it to myself for now.  Anyways, for your viewing pleasure, Jackie the sword wielding Mountie.

 

We had Sarah's wedding shower on Sunday which was a lot of fun.  Angie made the most amazing video asking Peter questions that Sarah had to answer or risk the punishment of a piece of hubba bubba for each wrong answer.  She did pretty well, and pulled out a few pretty impressive answers.  Like, Which celebrity would Pete say Sarah would run away with if she could.  Answer - Benedict Cumberbatch, and she got it.  Lol, I guess it makes sense that she knows, but for them both to know, and for it to be more on the obscure side.  If you haven't watched the BBC Sherlock Holmes it's an absolute must.  And after that answer Pete said, "He's tall and lanky, and abrasive...he's pretty much a better looking me."  And then to end a great party I slipped while walking down the steps from the upstairs washroom.  That's my second stair slip in just under a month.  So lets just hope I've gotten the quota filled for the next few years, but I'm thinking probably not.

I have to think about a nice dinner to serve Sarah and Pete tomorrow night.  He's so anti-carb, and such a great cook, it's a challenge.  I'm considering serving some of the banana bread I made tonight.  I struggle with sharing my baking though.  It's a low cooking esteem issue.  Worst case scenario, more for me.

Ta.

Step On It, Electronic

New glasses and shades:

Easter egg - I'm holding up a mirror behind my phone because lets face it, I'm new here.

TGIM?

I woke up sleeping the wrong way at the end of my bed again this morning.  I don't understand how it happens, and it's mildly concerning.

I just got home from volunteering at a comedy event put on by the charity I volunteer with.  I tried to do them a favour on Friday and pick up the kegs Molson donated, but at 165 pounds a keg the guy at their beer store said no way for a car.  It could potentially be enough weight (ugh) to break an axle.  So I took a pass on that.  I went into their office after the failed pick up anyhow to do a few things for them.  Then Friday night Nikki called in on my offer to go help her finish packing.  It was 11pm by the time I got there, but I worked until 1:30am packing up some clothes, and cleaning up her living room.  And when I could no longer breath I took my leave for the spare room upstairs.  The cat-free spare room.

Saturday we were up at 7:30 to do a Timmy's run, pick up the truck, and start boogeying.  Another friend came by at about 10 and we started to really move.  I warned Nikki in advance my endurance is not tops, so after a few trips up and down the stairs to the curb side I was already ready for a break.  Her mom and other friend did some amazing powerhouse lifting which was quite impressive.  After heavy furniture, me and her other friend loaded most everything else piece by piece.  I passed it up and he arranged it inside the truck.  By the time we got the van to Mississauga my joints were locking up from being overworked and then sedentary for an hour and I don't think any of us were in the mood to continue.  But we pushed through it.  I did the most complaining, but heck, I showed up and did my best which is more than most people can say.  We probably got 1/3 to 1/2 way through unloading when one last friend showed up.  He took lots of heavy boxes and lifted some of the heavier pieces.  Nik actually reminded me that I had told her I'd help her as long as she left her tv stand unit, which she said she was leaving, but then recanted on that promise.  The very last piece was her turtle's terrarium which was in my car and I said I just flat out didn't have the energy to lift.  Those things can be worth hundreds of dollars and I didn't have enough faith that I wouldn't drop it.  Once that was all done it was off to drop off the truck and back to Guelph to take take her friend back to his car, and for Nik and I to pick up the cats and transport them to their new home.  We each took two, carefully paired off for who she thought would provide the most calming effects on the other.  One of mine was so pissed off she didn't say a thing the entire ride.  The other one messed her carrier and cried about it for half an hour.  I'd cry too if I had to sit in my own mess for that long.  About 2 minutes into the trip I started sneezing and blowing my nose.  I thought I was going to be a total goner by the time we arrived back in the 'Saug.  But about 20 minutes in the sneezing stopped.  Of course, my car has officially been danderfied and I'm going to get the sniffles for a while.  Nik already apologized in advance for that.

So after that 26 hour move, and 5 hours of volunteering tonight I'm pooped.  I'm also blogged out.  I seem to have gone on blog overdrive, but I'm going to tone it down a bit.

Layta playas.

Also...

I found this wicked pin I got from my nan while cleaning up tonight:

Around The World in 80 Beers

In my massive apartment clean-up I have come across the fabled Around the World in 80 Beers passport from Bottlescrew Bill's.  As long as they remain open, I will go down in Bottlescrew infamy as a successful member of the 80 Beers club.  Feb 22, 2008 - Julie McGavin.  I should quickly say, the challenge was to drink 80 worldly beers in a year, and record them all in a passport.  Not much of a challenge but it worked, and we went back to the bar many times that year. And now for your reading pleasure, I will list off the 80 beers.  Yes, Stella is on their twice, but it's not my fault they changed the menu and moved it.  I only caught this mistake after the fact.  But technically you didn't have to drink 80 different beers to win, as one of my coworkers was drinking 80 Stellas Around the World.  I think he made it to 12.  In no particular order, as they appeared on the menu.

  1. Brahma - Brazil
  2. Victoria Butter - Australia
  3. Jack Rabbit (Big Rock) - Calgary
  4. Newcastle Brown Ale - England
  5. San Miguel - Philippines
  6. Red Stripe - Jamaica
  7. Miller Genuine Draft - USA
  8. Fuller's Organic Honey Dew - England
  9. Holsten Premium - Germany
10. Goesser Premium - Austria
11. Lead Dog Ale - Yukon (just wow)
12. Harp Lager - Ireland
13. Zyweic - Poland
14. Becks - Germany
15. Tennents - Scotland
16. Smithwicks - Ireland
17. Erdinger Dunkel Draught - Germany
18. Lasko Club - Slovenia
19. Affligem - Belgium
20. Sol - Mexico
21. Bitburger - Germany
22. Lowenbrau - Germany
23. Paulaner Hefe - Germany
24. Warsteiner Pilsner - Germany
25. Hacker Pschorr Weisse - Germany
26. OK Springs Porter - Canada
27. Konig Ludwig Wheat - Germany
28. Carib - Trinidad
29. Naughty Nellies Ale - USA
30. Fish Tale Organic - USA
31. Bellevue Kriek - Belgium (thick cherry deliciousness)
32. Okocim - Poland
33. Duckstein Amber - Germany
34. Stella Artois - Belgium
35. Tuborg - Denmark
36. Mickey's Wide Mouth - USA
37. Erdinger Weissbier - Germany
38.  Wild Rose Velvet Fog - Calgary
39. Grolsch - Holland
40. Stella Artois - Belgium - HALF WAY!!  I think there's a clear winner for overall alkie country.  But I won't judge.
41. Efes Pilsner - Turkey
42. Steigl - Austria
43. Pilsner Urquell - Czech Republic
44. Steinlager - New Zealand
45. Bass Ale - England
46. Edelweiss Weissbier - Germany
47. Tsingtao - China
48. Delirium Tremens - Belgium
49. Tiger Lager - Singapore
50. Asahi Dry - Japan
51. Patagonia - Argentina
52. McEwans Scotch Ale - Scotland
Are you still with me?  If you are, don't drink that last one.  Transcribing a list of 80 is taking longer than I thought.
53.  Kirin Ichiban - Japan
54. Singha - Thailand
55. Tetley's English Ale - England
56.  Slavutich - Ukraine
57. Dos Equis XX Amber - Mexico
58. Castle Lager - South Africa
59. Reserva 1925 - Spain
60. Samuel Adams - USA
61. Taj Mahal - India
62. Seattle Pale Ale - USA
63. Coopers - Australia
64. Heineken - Holland
65. Brick Lager Red Cap - Ontario
66. Great Western Honey Wheat
67. McAuslan St. Ambroise - Quebec
68. Buzzard Breath Ale Draught - Quebec
69. Blanche de Chambry - Quebec
70. Trois Pistoles - Quebec
Still here?  Don't drink that last one either.
71. Westmall Dubbel - Belgium
72. Sleeman Amber - Ontario
73. Moosehead Pale Ale - New Brunswick
74. Alley Kat Full Moon Ale - Calgary (I had this one last if that matters at all)
75. Sleemans Original Draught - Ontario
76. Shaftbury Cream Ale - British Columbia
77. Guiness - Ireland
78. Cannery Blackberry Porter - BC (I had this one twice by mistake, and regretted it each time).
79. Arctic Red Draught, Yukon (why YT, why)
80. Mytho's Lager - Greece.

And now, for your reading pleasure I shall repeat the list, but in the chronological order of my consumption.

NOT.

I'm so cool  it hurts.  Peace.

Because That's How I Roll

I had a bit of an upset with my bank this week.  Last month I moved all my monies into a new savings account with a super rate, almost 6x what I was previously earning.  And yes, I was earning a fraction of a peanut before I woke up to new possibilities.  I sat down with my advisor, he suggested the new account, we did the swap, and donesies or so I thought.  At the end of the month I got a $5 service charge for the transfer (I never got service fees for money transfers before).  And that meant my account was in red, in negative, omgwtfbbq.  I had a minor panic attack and quickly moved over the amount of money needed to cover the deficit.  That was probably 4 days into the month.  Then this month I get a $0.01 overdraft interest charge and once again my account is showing up in red.  Bright red if you ask me, but most people would probably just say it was normal red.  I've been emailing my bank dude lately about my mortgage and meetings and such so I open up an email and draft a politely scathing email.  Once in red fine, but twice in two months for an account I'm not using???  He wrote back with an update and asked me to clarify which account and said that he would reimburse me.  I said for the amount of interest I'm making in the new account he needn't bother, and I was done with my freak out.  And this was his response:

 "No I'll reimburse you because thats how I roll lol! Have a great day"

I think if I had drawn any other advisor at the bank I would be having a completely rotten time starting out with my new banking ventures.  He's just the coolest.  I'm still on high bamboozle alert at all times.  But so far so good.

Things...

The question is, what is something I don't like doing on a Monday afternoon after a long day of work?

The answer - getting stuck in a stairwell with no exits.

I guess I can cross that one off my bucket list and hope that it never happens again.  T_T

I should also add that one thing I do like doing it playing Mario Party with my besties.